A regular patron calls

She usually calls for telephone numbers, company addresses, 800 numbers; when the stimulus bill passed in the Senate, she called for the telephone numbers of the three Republican who voted for it (promising to raise hell with them).

Today she asked, first: does the library own Brave new world revisited (Aldous Huxley). No, I said (our copy is missing). "Can you tell me what libraries do own it?" Several, I told her. A long pause. Hello? Yes, she said; she was thinking.

Next: "Is the DVD Expelled: no intelligence allowed back yet?" No, I said to her. "It was supposed to be back last week," she asserted. It isn't back. "It was supposed to be back. Two weeks ago. It was in transit." It isn't here. "It was in transit." It actually is In Transit and has 1 hold. "How long does it take to get back? It was in transit."

"Be that as it may, it isn't here." By now two other patrons were in front of me, here at the Information Desk.

A long pause.

"Is there anything else I can help you with, ma'am? I need to help another patron."

Click.